Friday, February 15: Something Blue
Pondering this post and blue-ness, my first thoughts headed toward the usual metaphorical suspects or as LD says in her excellent foray, “the lugubrious direction.” I decided against that for several reasons, mostly because I was late and I wanted to do something quick and also because I just didn’t feel like hanging out with the usual suspects today.
As I did with the last one, I decided to use this post as motivation for taking an action that needed doing: placing two blue glass bottles in a niche in my living room. The provenance of the bottles is a whole other story. Let’s just say they are older than I am and have sentimental value. Keeping them in plain sight where they can be appreciated, yet out of harm’s way has always taken a fair amount of effort, as I am one of those “bull dyke in a china shop” types.
I bought this place after the split up, and I was in a weird headspace to say the least. I knew I wanted to buy a home, I had a modest wad of cash via my ex buying me out of the other place, and so I was shopping. I went back and forth between buying a smaller and/or older place in a more remote area with more acreage or buying a newer place with more amenities closer into town. I was leaning heavily toward the first but after a last minute gut check decided the latter was probably better suited for where I was financially, emotionally, well, just all ’round.
It was odd to be shopping for a house at that moment in time. Hell, it was more than odd, it was downright surreal but then so was my life in general, so I rolled with the flow, and drove around with a feisty older, slightly manic, real estate broker for a few days and let her do her thing.
When I first walked through this place and saw the niches up high in the peaked ceiling living room, my first thought was that it would be a good place for my blue bottles. It wasn’t some “aha” moment or a deciding factor, but it was significant that it was the first time I actually envisioned something of mine, of my former life, fitting into one of these strange newer houses I was driving around looking at. It was the great kitchen and huge bathtub that finally swayed me but my mind’s eye view of seeing my bottles in that niche was a first step.
Given that, one might think that putting those bottles up would have been one of the first things I did after moving in. Not so.
Second steps sometimes take a little longer.